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Guidelines for Step Parents

Starting up a new home with your new partner is not easy. On your part, you too may not approve of everything your stepchildren do or you may have had certain preconceived notions about them. And if both the partners already have children of their own, then your dreams of happy domesticity can quickly get shattered because of regular tiffs and quibbles. In case situations take a turn for the worst, family lawyers are always there to help you. But before that, you as a parent must keep in mind a few things so that your blended family has a fair chance of succeeding.

Don’t Expect Miracles

Give yourself and your stepchildren enough time to know each other. Don’t expect a sense of bonhomie overnight. Relationships take time to evolve, especially something as delicate and complicated as a bond between a stepchild and the stepparent. Keep an open mind and be prepared for rejection or rude behaviour.

Don’t Suppress your True Feelings

It is also okay if you don’t like something about your stepchild/children. Not everybody is perfect and it is but natural that you will have your own set of disciplines and manners which can differ drastically from what the child learnt from the earlier parent. Have an open discussion, be prepared to give and take but always insist on respect and good behaviour.

Avoid Over-indulgence

A common mistake most stepparents make is to over-indulge their stepchildren in an effort to make them feel included and wanted. This will never create the desired impression; rather your stepchildren will take undue advantage, your biological children will feel neglected and deprived and there will be ill-feeling all around.

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